What if that was your son?

God says, "That's MY son. And you're My body. I'm not there, except through you. Your hands, those are My hands. Your feet, those are My feet. I'm a father to the fatherless through My body. I rescue the weak and the vulnerable THROUGH YOU. And if you're not doing it, NO ONE IS."

Another Ugandan Boy?

I finally got an email from Jalia at Royal Orphanage in Uganda today, about another older boy we could adopt along with Kato Fred:

I am thinking of Rogers. He traveled with the choir in 2006 to America, he is about 15 or 16 now and in high school, he is a good boy and sings well.

Jalia

Her emails are always so tantalizing – you’re left wanting more. : ) I have so many questions, but she apparently has an ancient computer that is really slow, and a dial-up connection. Thankfully, the Tuckers will probably be going there at the beginning of November to pick up their children (yay!), and they can meet him, and get more information about him, and Kato as well. They are hoping to get a laptop donated for Jalia as well to take to her when they go, so she can be more connected.

This is a video about the choir who came in 2006, and what they were raising money for (thankfully, the new school and orphanage has now been built). I guess Rogers may be one of the boys in there:

Uganda or Ethiopia?

This past week, four of the boys from the African Children’s Choir stayed at our house for two days. They are from Uganda, and are between 9 and 11, so it was interesting being around them, thinking, we could have boys like this in our family within the next year. Here they are, listening to one of their chaperones tell them a bedtime story:

And here they are with Alex and Trevor:

Then today, I got two emails. One was from Jodi; she sent me the link to a video of some older boys, taken at Royal School and Orphanage in Uganda, the place where she is adopting her kids and where Kato Fred is. This is the link - http://www.vimeo.com/5425469; you have to click play and wait for it to load (I don’t know how to embed videos, sorry – need to take the time to figure it out). As I watched it, especially seeing the boys who loved music, I thought -– I could totally see some of these boys in our family. (This is another great video from the orphanage, of Jalia, the lady who started it and runs it -- http://vimeo.com/5478551).

Later I got this email from Eileen, who just got back from Ethiopia:

I just got home last night and I am so excited to tell you I have several boys to recommend for adoption. I was thinking of you the entire time I was there and so many of them asked me to please find them a family. I have to get all my photos together and videos that I will be posting soon. There are two boys that are specifically special to my cousin Georgie that he asked me to tell you about. Do you have an age range in mind?? I have several older and younger... I can't wait to tell you about them!

I’m waiting to hear back from Eileen, and I’m also going to email Jalia in Uganda to ask her about another possible boy to adopt with Kato Fred, or maybe two brothers. So, please pray and agree with us that God would lead us to the specific children he has for our family. Obviously, there are so many in need, it can be overwhelming.

Preparation, and the Equation

Even though it’s really been just in the last two months that I have seriously been thinking about adoption, and moving in that direction, I’ve been thinking back, and there have been many things that have brought me (and Darren) to this point. The first time I remember really thinking about the possibility of adoption was in Hong Kong, when one of the ladies I knew was fostering a little Chinese girl from an orphanage there, and she brought her to a mom’s meeting I went to. Even then, I thought I would really like to do that – maybe foster some of the orphaned babies, or even adopt – but my own kids were so young at the time, and I just didn’t have the energy. But Darren and I did talk about it at that time, the possibility of one day adopting a little girl from China.

When we returned to the U.S., I would read articles about kids in the foster system needing homes, and just feel such compassion for them. I thought off and on about fostering. Then in 2005, Justin and I went to Zambia to work with an orphanage there, and I was so touched by the couple who had started it. It just started one child at a time, as they came across children who needed homes, whose parents had died of AIDS, or were in other difficult situations. They just started taking them in, one after the other, and so their orphanage grew. It challenged me – I wanted to do that, to just take in and care for children with no home or family.

I read books about people who adopted, who had large families of kids from all over the world, or about others who started orphanages (like Heidi Baker in Mozambique, and Haregewoin Teferra in Ethiopia) and I was so drawn to those stories. But inside me, there was always something saying, “Well, they are different. They have this grace or that ability or this circumstance that makes it easier for them to do those kinds of things.”

Then, in the last year or so, especially after Justin graduated and pretty much moved out, I have started to feel really restless. I have had more time and energy with only the two boys left at home, and felt that God was moving me into a new phase in my life; so I have just been praying and trying to figure out what he wants me to do. I have been working with Friends of Mirembe to help support the African Children’s Choir, and have done some work with other orphan ministries; but I knew there was something more for me to do.

And, my house has been really bugging me. We have this huge home, just made for kids, and especially teens (with the basement to hang out in), and only the two boys left at home. I know that God blessed us with this house for a reason. But every time I would walk by Lindsay’s and Justin’s empty rooms, they would really bother me. I started to feel like we either needed to sell our home and downsize, or fill those rooms somehow. I even offered Justin’s room to my cousin’s son, who needed a place to live for a while, and he has been living here for a few months; but I knew that wasn’t a long-term solution.

So, the equation thus far has been:

compassion for orphans + more time/energy + lots of unused space in our house = ?

And I think God is saying all of that = adopt some more kids.:)

Next Steps

I knew that God was encouraging me, building my faith, leading me in the direction of adoption, but I wasn’t ready to say, I know this is what we’re supposed to do. I was at church one morning, and realized that Jodi was leaving in a few days for Uganda, and would be meeting the three children she is adopting at the orphanage where they currently live. I felt like the next small step I should take was to tell her that God had been moving on my heart in this area, and ask her to just keep her eyes open while she was there, to see if the Holy Spirit might lead her to an older boy needing to be adopted. She said she would (and was very excited).

Later that day, I finally shared with Darren all that God had been speaking to me in my heart, to see how he felt. I hadn’t wanted to say anything earlier, because I just wasn’t sure this was really God’s leading. It was actually very hard for me to verbalize, because it is such a big thing to me. But, I figured that if Jodi was looking for a boy for us in Uganda, maybe it was time to say something about it. :)

Darren and I have talked about adopting over the years, since the time we were in Hong Kong – he loves kids and is a great dad :) - so I knew he was open to it. I told Darren my main concern was financial, knowing how expensive overseas adoptions are, and knowing we just don’t have the funds. But he said, you just can’t say that – you can’t put a price on the life of a child. And as he said that, I remembered God leading us to Hong Kong back in 1990 – we knew he was calling us there, but didn’t have the money to move there or live there. But we walked forward anyway, and as we did, he provided every step of the way, for every need we had. I knew that our responsibility is to follow him, and he will provide as we do.

So, fast forward another week or so (this is about mid-July); Jodi gets back from Uganda, and Jerry (her husband) sends me a one-line email saying, “Just so you know…we found your son.” I think I responded, “Oh my goodness.” A little overwhelming, to say the least.:) Later Jodi sent me a couple of pictures, with this explanation:

Attached is a photo of the boy named "Kato Fred.” He is the best friend of our daughter Agnes (whom they are adopting), and a really nice boy. Agnes specifically asked me to take this photo because she said she "hoped I could help Fred be adopted also.” I think Jerry told you, Kato means "twin.” His twin died and he is alone at the orphanage. I don't have any other details about him, but of course I know how to find out. There is also a photo of him doing dishes with my girls at the guest house, which is on the compound at the orphanage (this is where we stayed). He is a great worker...your kitchen would be clean! :)

So, a new thing to add to all that I’m pondering in my heart – is this possibly our new son?